3rd installment of a 5 part series:

Read Part 2!

 The Influencer under stress is not a pretty sight. Take Brilliant Betty for instance. Betty is extroverted, loves people and is terrific at bringing people together to support a vision, mission or project. She needs to feel liked and accepted, so she seeks out opportunities to receive attention from others. Now this attention isn’t a ‘nice to have’ for Betty. It’s an emotional need that’s like oxygen for her.

Now Betty is a ton of fun to be around, but meeting deadlines are often a challenge for her. And she often underestimates the amount of time required to finish her work.

Betty also struggles with formal structure and organization, preferring a more free flowing environment. In a perfect world, Betty would funnel all her natural Influencer talents toward her team or family goals. She’d create a plan and rallying cry, gather everyone’s support, and then cheer them on with her endless positivity. 

But the reality is it’s not a perfect world. Stress and structure infiltrate her daily life, and she’s still having to work remotely due to COVID-19. She likes having her husband and kids home with her because she’s such a people person. But the work dynamic is real struggle. She’s been assigned to a new team and she’s never met them in person! Brilliant Betty feels isolated from her office peeps and it’s causing her cheerful, friendly outlook to disintegrate.

She loves the little office oasis she’s created for herself at home. But without friends to chat with, the constant affirmation from her in-office fan club, a physical boss to keep her coloring inside the lines, and having to figure out how to interact with a whole new team is stressful. Her kids seem to need something all the time, and her husband is no help. He’s locked in his office on calls all day. She was so stressed yesterday that she yelled at her kids and one of her teammates. In the blink of an eye, Brilliant Betty transformed into Ballistic Betty.   

Helping the Influencer Under Stress

It may seem strange, but under a lot of stress and pressure, the Influencer can go into attack mode. When this happens to Betty she knows she’s out of control and that acting inappropriately is a lose-lose situation for everyone involved. So how can Brilliant Betty maintain a sense of balance and safeguard herself and others from her ballistic alter ego? Here are three simple tips to give Betty a P.A.T. on the back and help her stay on track.

P: Positivity

The Influencer needs to feel accepted and so they require a lot of positive feedback. Check-in with them often and remind them of their value within the team. This will be helpful especially during stressful times when they may be more talkative, expressive and attention-seeking. 

A: Assume Responsibility

The Influencer is often the ‘idea’ person on a team because of their creativity. However, they often fall prey to disorganization. This is especially true when they take on too much. Disorganization can lead to stress and you now know what can happen to Betty when she’s stressed. So help the Influencer stay organized and on task with a process called “time blocking”(https://www.wikihow.com/Time-Block) or Trello boards (https://trello.com). These methods are more visually appealing and interactive than a regular calendar. Plus they’ll help the Influencer make full use of their time. That way they can complete all of their projects, assignments, and tasks.

T: Talk

If you are an Influencer type and feeling stressed and vulnerable at work, it’s important to get to the bottom of what’s creating the stress. Talking to a manager or team member you work closely with is a good starting point. It’s possible that by outing the stressors, you can work together to come up with a better solution. You could speak with someone in HR or even a private counselor to air your feelings. Their objective response can help you create a plan for managing your stress.


Brilliant Betty and her fellow Influencers can be incredibly valuable team members. However, the influencer personality type under stress can derail their efforts and damage their relationships within the team. The key then, is to understand how best to work with the Influencer. This involves helping them feel like an important member of the team. Then make sure they have organizational tools that appeal to creatives. Finally, remember that the Influencer often needs to talk about their feelings in order to process them. Keeping Brilliant Betty from becoming Ballistic Betty is often as simple as lending an ear. 

If you’d like to learn how to work better with the Influencers in your life, contact us today. We provide personality development that focuses on understanding why we show up the way we do, and how to proceed productively with that information.

Up Next: The Peaceful/Steady Under Stress

This post was originally posted April 26, 2020.

You may also like: