“There is probably no quality or characteristic that is as rare as trust.” Patrick Lencioni
What is Trust?
The formal definition is ‘the assured reliance on the character, ability, strength or truth of someone or something.’ But really, trust is about vulnerability.
In fact, we think Patrick Lencioni’s definition is way more impactful. In his book, The Five Dysfunctions of a Team, Lencioni states,
“When it comes to teams, trust is all about vulnerability. Team members who trust one another learn to be comfortable being open, even exposed, to one another around their failures, weaknesses and fears. Now, if this feels a little touchy-feely, that’s not where I’m going with it. Vulnerability-based trust is predicated on the simple – and practical – idea that people who aren’t afraid to admit the truth about themselves are also not going to engage in the kind of political behavior that wastes everyone’s time and energy, and more importantly, makes the accomplishment of results an unlikely scenario.”
We’ve probably all experienced that on some level. At Brilliant People, we know it doesn’t have to be this way.
Trust and Your Relationships At Work
We’ve all experienced broken trust at some point in our work environments. Possibly, it was you that broke someone else’s trust, or maybe yours was broken. Consequently, there were bad feelings left behind. But you know what? You can learn from your own mistakes as well as those of others! A few things to consider in regard to this might be:
- How did it feel?
- How did it affect the relationship?
- Were you able to repair the relationship after the trust was broken?
For some, a sincere apology does the trick, and they move on. For others, they want you to prove yourself over and over again, to gain their trust back. And as you can imagine, that could take a very long time.
Repairing relationships isn’t easy but the effort is worth it. In your current role, no matter what it is, you need good working relationships and building trust is the only way to get there.
The #1 Destroyer of Teams
In his book, The 5 Dysfunctions of a Team, Patrick Lencioni states that ‘absence of trust’ is the #1 destroyer of teams. The other layers in this model are important, but trust is the foundation for cohesive, collaborative, and productive teams.
Now, there are a zillion books on leadership that can tell you what leadership skills you need to be successful. But wouldn’t you know, leadership isn’t just about you. You have to take into account the needs of those people you hope will follow your lead. The good news? Those who follow leaders really only have 4 basic needs.
Want to take a guess at what those might be?
Based on research for a book called Strengths Based Leadership: Great Leaders, Teams, and Why People Follow, the 4 basic human needs are trust, compassion, stability, and hope.
So, how do you build trust with those that have been entrusted to you?
Steps to Success
First, we believe the #1 thing you have to do is be vulnerable with your coworkers. That might be a bit scary for some. I mean, people don’t usually think: Hey! Let’s go be vulnerable at work today! Said no one ever…
But, remember what I said earlier? Team members who trust each other learn to be comfortable being open to one another around their failures, weaknesses and even fears. It won’t happen overnight, but persistence will get there.
Depending on personality and personal history, vulnerability may be hard for some. So let’s take a moment to understand how our personality types play into this.
As a refresher, let’s discuss some of the struggles each personality type might have while trying to build trust.
Dominance: Direct, forceful, lack of concern for others, impatience, insensitive
influence: Talkative, disingenuous, impulsive, lack of follow-through, disorganized
Steadiness: Slow to respond, acquiescent, too accommodating, avoid changes, indecisive
Conscientiousness: perfectionist, over analytical, skeptical, overly critical, keeps to themselves
Remember: I’m not saying this IS who you are, or that you WILL struggle. I’m just saying this is how others might perceive you, which can cause some issues.
The #2 thing you can do to develop trust with your coworkers is to get to know them. And I don’t mean the superficial stuff like their name or role in the company. I mean, you need to take the time to understand who they are and why they show up the way they do. This means you need to spend time finding out what drives them, what their aspirations are, what they’re passionate about, where they’re from, whether or not they’re married, divorced, have kids, etc. will go a long way in developing genuine relationships at work.
A few things to consider as you work to build trust on your team:
- How will each of your personality struggles keep you from being vulnerable and/or authentic with your coworkers?
- How can you use your strengths to overcome those struggles?
- Define some commitments that will help you create a foundation of trust with anyone you connect with.
It’s up to us as individuals to do our part. Ultimately, it’s our responsibility to create the change we want to see in the workplace. And it starts with TRUST.
Call us for information on The Five Behaviors of a Cohesive Team training. This program is based on the model shown in this post.
The culture (r)evolution starts with you and we’re here to help.
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